This post began from a video that was posted on a friend of mines’ face book page. (The Link is below) There was an African American couple that were gushing about how in love they were. The woman based their success on the fact that she was submissive to her husband. She also talked about different roles we have in relationships. What really got me upset was the fact that the man was the leader and the provider and the woman just takes the backseat. As a single mother I can never allow this to happen in my relationship. I refuse to sit back and just be a trophy wife. I want to be able to speak my mind and interject my thoughts when it comes to matters of the family. I do believe that a man should be a leader, but that doesn’t mean I can’t lead as well. The key to a great relationship is compromise. If men knew how to compromise and let their mate lead at times, they would encounter less issues in the relationship. But most men have a “caveman” mindset(my mom’s words lol). They only want their mate to do and not say. Well, if this means I have to be single forever than oh well. I am not going to let a man just come in and think he runs things just because he is a man and God says so. God says a lot but do we follow those things?
Another comment that was made was how non supportive Black women were. I think that this is also untrue. If you come to me with a well thought out idea and have taken steps toward this goal, then I will back you up 100%. People go wrong when they put all their faith in someone without having any knowledge of what’s going on. Regardless, you have to be smart. This person could be here today and gone tomorrow and you’ll be left with his “big” dream mess. I know I am too independent to ever become a submissive woman. I want to be a strong and supportive mate who can also hold her own.What real man wants a woman that let’s him walk all over her? A real man would want an equal as a partner and submission is not about equality. If we can’t be equal then what’s the point? Like I said before I’d rather be single for the rest of my life than be a pushover.