Okay…so this is a post that is long overdue. I have been trying to figure out how to put into words some of the feelings I get when I notice females jumping from relationship to relationship. Now, in the title I am basically referring to the automatic response you get when you tell someone you do not want to be in a relationship, but you still would like to have sex. Gasp! Oh my. You mean you can have sex and not be in a relationship? What kind of woman am I? *side eyes* I am a normal female that has had a long history of relationship issues…(see previous posts)…. and I am not interested in going down that road again. For me, sex is not nearly as bad as giving your all to someone and having them treat you like crap and then you repeating the steps all over again with someone else two days later. So if I’m a “hoe” then you are a “relationship hoe.” Let’s break that down.
A “relationship hoe” is basically a person who constantly needs to be in a relationship to validate themselves. If they are not actively in a relationship, they feel like their life is not worth living. Because of this thought process, they tend to stick around and take crap from their worthless counterpart just because they need to be linked to someone. A “relationship hoe” has low self esteem. They have to because why would you continuously jump from relationship to relationship not giving yourself time to heal. Every relationship or encounter is suppose to teach you something. But how can you learn anything if you are going right into another relationship? To me, that makes you a lot worse off than someone like me.
Now, let’s discuss why I am a “hoe” in so many females eyes. And I said females because men seem to get where I am coming from whenever I explain my situation. I believe that any woman that is sexually active and purposely chooses to not be in a relationship or even get married is labeled. It’s like if you don’t go with society’s way of thinking you are the devil. No…this is 2013 and I am a realist. I know that love exists and yada yada yada…but I don’t have time to explore it, nor do I have the desire. Some think that this is due to me never being in love and once again, check the previous posts, this is definitely not true. Been there…got stuck there…never want to go back. Well, at least not right now. I want to focus on me and my happiness. I want to explore dating and just have fun. I am not screwing multiple men and getting paid for it, (definition of a hoe). I am just being sexually active, safely, with one guy that I have no interest in dating. What is so wrong with that? There is no exchange of feelings, emotions, money, nothing. So why is it that I catch flack for doing what I am doing but you think you are the holy one? To be honest, I am smarter than you “relationship hoes.” I am not giving away my whole life for a guy who is not even worthy. I am not making life decisions with a man that will be gone tomorrow and then once he leaves I find another and start doing the exact same thing. No, I don’t see your logic.
With that being said, life is about making yourself happy. If you want to be a “relationship hoe” then do it, but don’t judge others just because they are not doing what you are doing. Especially when you have not thought about it logically. Just because someone goes against the grain does not make them any less than you. Think about that before you decide to judge someone’s life or relationship status. I am a proud single woman and even prouder that I don’t depend on love to get me through my day. Especially when that love is fake and full of wishes. Let’s grow up and open our eyes people. Those fairytale endings belong in the books…do not apply to real life.
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